November 17th

Today was my actual due date so I figured it was as good a day as any for an Ava update. I am quickly learning what it means to go on little to no sleep, and I won't deny, it's hard. She sleeps all day every day, and wants to be awake all night long. I'm pooped, seriously. What makes it worse, is I feel like I waste my day away taking naps and such...my house is still in utter chaos from when we moved, which bothers me. ughhh.

I just...I feel like I'm still not getting the knack of all of this, which upsets me. I want to be so great at this mommy thing, but honestly, I don't feel like I am. I am trying to learn though.

On a more positive note, I had my follow up obgyn appointment this week, and I am officially 17 pounds less then my last prenatal appointment, and I am 9 pounds less then my before pregnancy weight. I still need to lose a lot, but I feel pretty awesome that I've already lost that much and I haven't even started dieting or working out. And she didn't help all that much, since she was a tiny little thing =)

Tomorrow we have another pediatrician appointment for her, which is not going to be fun...time for shots. yuck =(

Anyway, that is all.

Ava

I am a bit delirious still from lack of sleep, but I felt the need to tell you all about the newest change in my life.

Yesterday I had an appointment with my dr. and her estimate was 2 weeks left for miss Ava to get here. Well, she quickly changed that answer to "sometime in the next 48 hours" when she checked me. I went home and had small contractions for a while, so I packed up bags and waited for Chad to get home; I knew he would rather take me there to be safe so I wanted to have everything I needed with me.

Honestly? I started having a lot of doubts in my abilities while I sat at home, waiting for all of this to happen. All I could think was that I was going to be a mom very soon, and there was so much that I hadn't done yet, that I should have already...so I started having that terrible mom syndrome. I guess pregnancy makes me extra over emotional? Anyway...

We checked in the emergency room, and they sent me over to the maternity ward, to be checked and...they decided to keep me! Needless to say it took so long to get to where I needed to be to have her. I was pretty good to go once they got that epidural in my system though; I thought I wasn't going to be able to handle it, but my contractions were so bad that I didn't even feel the needle! Such a plus!

Anyway, to spare all of the yucky details, Ava decided to get here at 2:31 am this morning(November 3rd) in all of her 5 pound 14 ounce glory. She is such a tiny little thing.

You know what's crazy though? Any doubt that I had about my abilities melted away as soon as I saw her. She's absolutely beautifully perfect in every way...such a mom thing to say right?

I couldn't have asked for a better man to have a baby with. Chad took such good care of me and constantly kept checking on me, and you know what? I think he fell harder in love with that little girl than he did with me...it was awesome.

I'm going to go back to sitting here in the hospital, but I thought I'd share a bit of my past two days, since they are for sure going to affect the rest of my life.