Newfound Pioneer Woman

So, after hearing my mom rave and rave continuously about this blog she follows, I decided to check it out. I'm sure everyone besides me has heard of her before now, but hey I'm a late bloomer. She calls herself the Pioneer woman, and has done countless interviews on the view and oprah and other things of that nature. I looked at her blog though, and she does countless features about recipes and her photography and just...she's actually pretty amazing.

I'm actually kind of envious of this woman. She's pretty amazing. haha.

I believe she's the type of mother that I wish I could be. They have a ranch/farm, and she's a stay at home mom. But everything she does involves activities with her kids, and all of her amazing photography sessions, and homeschooling, and house work and farm work and...as weird as it sounds I believe I would have a blast doing something like that with my life. I would feel useful I think, unlike now.

I have become so wrapped up with getting sick from this freakin pregnancy, that I have totally shown a lack of appreciation for everything that Chad has done for me. He works 7 days a week, plus overtime to take care of me. He's told me that if I didn't go back to work he would take care of me and the baby. And what do I do? Lie around the house feeling sorry for myself and how I feel. How pathetic. And what do I do for him in return? I mean, I can't even cook...I'm a terrible housekeeper. I'm just...lazy I guess. I want to break out of this that I am. I want to be a great wife and housekeeper and mother ...I want to do things for him like he does for me. And I think what pisses me off the most is when anyone acts like they know anything about us or our lives. If they really did, I think they would know that he has taken care of me more than anyone else has, and I couldn't have asked for a better father for my child. I look forward to growing together and embarking on this journey that we're about to experience.

A Nosey Nose that Knows best...? I am crazy

I haven't felt like the luckiest person to ever get knocked up. I mean, I'm happy and all but I seem to be getting ever stupid symptom possible already and it freakin sucks! My synuses(sp?) are swollen shut and I cant breathe, and my nose runs all day every day and I keep coughing. And I'm getting morning sickness every freakin day. I can't wait to get fatter so all of this sucky part will go away! haha. I know, I'm a big complainer but I feel like I can't even go anywhere because I feel so nauseous all the time.

Anyway...I have my first doctor's appointment on april 5th unless I can find one sooner. I'm getting pretty excited though. I'm pretty sure that here soon they will (hopefully) be able to tell me the sex of the baby. =) and you know what that means? I can waste my night making registries for baby stuff, which is the most fun part of all this! haha.

I'm luckier than most I guess, in the sense that since I feel sick all the time, I really don't over eat or get cravings or anything, so hopefully I wont have a hard time losing weight afterwards- hopefully I won't get that huge. *crossing fingers*

kk..off to go sleep some more. wooooooo

A grape? really????

I'm starting to feel that tiny bit of doubt in the back of my mind for letting the "cat out of the bag" , so to speak. I'm happy, really I am, and everyone is acting all excited...which I must admit, the attention is kind of fun.lol. But I'm still not at that point where I know everything is ok, where I know exactly what's going on with my body or anything really. I'm still waiting to hear back so I can get a real checkup. I dunno...I'm just nervous I guess.

But since I'm a crazy person, I was looking up foods to eat and not eat, and it brought me to all these pages where it tells me what's going on at 9 weeks, which is how far along the doctor thinks I am. Apparently my baby no longer has a tail, which is a relief for most moms to hear I would think. haha. Also, the baby is about the size of a grape. A freakin grape! So I look like a cow, and I only have an extra grape inside of me??? How ridiculous is that? It really is amazing though. I just found out the other day, and I'm already taking all of this on pretty well I think. I'm even a little bit excited. Crazy huh?

I am way more tired that I usually am, but I think I still need to wake myself up early every day, or at least at the same time, because I don't want to sit around doing nothing all the time. I feel so unmotivated, and it sucks. I need to clean and do laundry and read(which I haven't done in a little while). I just feel blahhhh...but I guess it comes with the territory. I actually am trying to get a hold of "What to expect while expecting." I think I may look on amazon, and get it used. =)

Ok, enough crazy, ranting from the queen of moodswings.

Peace out homies?

News

It's not exactly the best quality picture but, you get the gist.

confusion and such

Ok, so first I must start by saying that I stumbled upon this picture, and I find it slightly hilarious. Does anyone remember that youtube video, "emo orange"? I think I might post that later.haha

Anyway, onto semi-important things?

I have some crazy things happening in my life, and lots of new opportunities becoming available. Which is so great. I am stuck with all this decision making, and I have no idea if I'm making good choices or not? I don't know if I should take a new awesome job with less pay and a further job, or keep the job I hate? or keep taking off weekends, or should I pick up more shifts because money is there? I dunno...I'm just so worn out. ugh.

Oh well.
Other disappointing news, Panera has discontinued their sundried tomato cream cheese, which is the most amazing thing ever. If you have never had it, go now and get some before they sell the last of it! Seriously, you will not regret it!

Sunday Funday

So unfortunately I'm not driving to tallahassee today (we didn't win powerball). lol.

Other new things that are good though, we got a bed on layaway and it's suuuper comfortable. I'm excited. =)

Another that I just found out today, is that I now have a few connections at cady and cady studio. Why is that good? Because I would love to work there!!!

Today really isn't all that incredibly interesting though. I have an enormous pile of laundry to sort through. Trash to take out and floors to mop. On the plus side though, I still have a can of tomato soup that I can make for lunch, which makes everything worthwhile.

Ok, enough of this boring post...I'm off to being semi-productive.

Listen to this playlist: mollieaunderwood's Playlist

Hello World

Hello Fellow Bloggers or whatnot. Wow...I'm a terrible person to follow I think, since I go months at a time without posting anything at all. I guess I just feel like there are certain aspects of my life that I shouldn't bother other people with? I dunno. Maybe I'm just a better follower when it comes to this sort of thing. Oh well.

What's new with mollie? Hmmmm well I'm still working at the crack shack, which is just great. *dripping sarcasm*. Don't get me wrong, there are so many worse places that I could work. I'm just at the point that I honestly don't feel like I can take this branch of customer service anymore. I'm sick of waiting on rude non-tippers, parents that can't control their beastly children, and people who look down on me because of my profession. It's ridiculous. I think what upsets me the most, is that I'm good at my job. Of all the things to be skilled at, it's the most unimportant thing I can imagine...and it sucks. I just feel like if I had any potential to be anything great, it has continuously faded the longer I have stuck with the resturaunt business. I just want something more...I want a break. I think I would rather work for minimum wage for a while, than stick with this. It's become so severe that I find myself lashing out for no reason. Hah...maybe I'm just crazy? I wouldn't doubt it.

While I'm on this negative path, I also would like to take this time to say that I hate where we live. It's awesome to be in jacksonville because of the convenience, but our apartment managers are rude. I just, I don't know really...I think I'm just becoming one of those people that needs to pack up and move every couple of months(which is crazy since I hate moving). I guess another thing that upsets me, is that this place was supposed to be a new start for me. I wanted to change my bad messy habits. I wanted to be the cute little housewife who cooks and cleans and has everything looking wonderful. I think I failed in about a week.

On another note, I feel myself pulling away from almost anyone. I'm just so tired of the judgemental attitudes of family or "friends" or anyone. I'm just tired. I just want to go into hiding for a year or two. Who knows, if I do maybe I'll be one of those crazy people who finds some kind of artistic awakening. lol

Ok, so I know that I just ranted a bunch of psychopathic babble for all of this, but hey...maybe I will get back into writing more often and make a little more sense with things. Yes? okkkk....